


Here

by FallenAngelWorks



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Cute Shizuo, M/M, he and Namie are sort of friends, hit me if I missed something, its a thing okay, jealous izaya, needy Izaya, no beta we die like men, shes pretty tame though, they're at least friendly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-22 12:16:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22982620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallenAngelWorks/pseuds/FallenAngelWorks
Summary: How did he end up here again? Hm, maybe it doesn't matter.
Relationships: Heiwajima Shizuo/Orihara Izaya
Comments: 5
Kudos: 117





	Here

_Shizuo really wasn’t sure how he had even gotten here._ He was laying on silk sheets, there was a working air conditioner overhead, the blankets were soft, and there was a warm body beside him. The fingers of his left hand dragged carefully over the shoulder of his partner, drawing nonsensical patterns—sometimes going as far as to trace out the characters of his name—while his right hand was occupied with a cigarette. None of it really made sense, there was no logical reasoning for him to be here—yet here he was. He was comfortable, he was warm, he was sated, he— _he was really sort of happy._ Sure, maybe it didn’t make a whole lot of sense, and maybe it unnerved him to an extent, but this feeling in his chest was enough to certify all of this as alright. _More than alright._ Shizuo took another drag of his cigarette before reaching towards the ashtray on the nightstand to stub out what was left.

The sun would start peeking through the gap in the curtains soon, and Shizuo tightened his grip on his companion for a moment, knowing that it would rouse him. A soft puff of breath against his collar and a slight shift of limbs had Shizuo turning his head just in time to watch bleary russet eyes open. _Izaya._ Shizuo reached to brush some of the hair that was sticking to the brunet’s cheek away, wanting a clearer look at his face as he woke up. Izaya was such a light sleeper, yet always looked like he had been woken from _death_ in the morning. Izaya stretched against him for a moment, the length of his body pressing up against Shizuo’s just before he relaxed again.

 _“M’ning”_ Izaya had closed his eyes again and resettled his head on Shizuo’s chest, and that warm fuzzy feeling hit Shizuo all over again as he let out a hum to answer Izaya’s questionable greeting. Shizuo reached to wrap his other arm around Izaya, felt the brunet relax even further just before shifting until he was laying on top of Shizuo. Izaya pressed his face into the crook of Shizuo’s neck, and for a moment Shizuo thought he might not mind going back to sleep for a little bit if Izaya was going to be so affectionate right now. Instead a kiss was pressed to Shizuo’s pulse point, and then a second at the hinge of his jaw, then Izaya was working his way along, pressing wet kisses to the blond’s skin until he could reach Shizuo’s mouth for a ravenous clash of tongues. Izaya’s fingers were tangled in hair, they were tugging just enough to border pain and pleasure, and Shizuo was taking notice that Izaya was hard against him. Shizuo pressed a hand to Izaya’s collar to push him away, to catch a breath, and to watch as a blush bloomed across his pale cheeks.

“Slow down—I’m not going anywhere.” Izaya hummed and then allowed his hands to recede from Shizuo’s hair until he could fold his arms across the blond’s chest and rest his chin there.

“Just because you aren’t going anywhere, doesn’t mean I can’t be excited. Come on, _I’m still loose from last night.”_ Izaya flexed his hips and arched his back a little as if to goad Shizuo, and while it would normally have worked, Shizuo was feeling particularly _soft_ today. Yeah, he could go for another round, _but not Izaya’s way._ Izaya liked sex to be volatile, violent even, and while Shizuo appreciated the fact that he didn’t _have_ to be super careful with Izaya, he really didn’t like giving into that sort of emotion when they were tangled up together. Shizuo had come to the realization that he loved Izaya long ago. Shizuo loved Izaya before they had started sharing an apartment, before they had started sleeping together— _before everything._ Shizuo had a sneaking suspicion that his dislike for Izaya in high school had been born from his attraction to him, and when he hadn’t known what to do with it, he had turned it into anger. _Love at first sight._

“You look lost Shizuo—what’s going on in that head?” Shizuo realized that he had just been staring at Izaya. Izaya was looking at him too though, his smile—that was usually better fit to a straight razor—was soft, just a slight upturn at the corners of his mouth, and his eyes were burning brighter than usual as the morning light hit them. Shizuo let his hands smooth up Izaya’s spine until he could cup the back of his head, wanting to bring him closer for a softer kiss, something close to tender. Izaya let out a sigh as Shizuo pulled away, and he fixed heavily lidded eyes on Shizuo’s face as his hips flexed a second time.

“Now I _really_ want to know what you were thinking.”

“Thinking about you. _I’m always thinking about you.”_ Shizuo brushed some more hair from Izaya’s face, thinking that he should probably suggest Izaya go for a haircut, it had been several weeks. Izaya’s eyes widened for a fraction of a second, and Shizuo watched as embarrassment flooded across his face in a fierce wave before he was pushing himself up and stepping towards the bathroom door. _The color had reached his shoulders, and Shizuo watched as it crawled down his back the same way it painted his chest._

“Of course you’re always thinking of me, I’m the best you’ve ever had. I’m hungry now, go make me breakfast while I bathe.” The bathroom door closed and Shizuo felt just a spark of _anger_ at that response. Izaya wasn’t the most affectionate partner, and Shizuo really had to read into the brunet’s words and actions to understand that they were said and done out of love. Whenever things got too intimate Izaya would throw up the defenses, and he’d sting Shizuo, say something, or do something to upset him—as if wanting to keep him at a distance still. As his anger quenched itself, realizing that maybe he had spoken a little too openly, Shizuo waited to hear the click of the lock on the bathroom door—it didn’t come—and the running of the faucet for the tub— _that sounds like the shower head—_ and concluded that Izaya was waiting for him. Izaya preferred to bathe in the mornings and shower in the evenings, and whenever Shizuo heard that shower head start up as the sun was rising, he knew Izaya was wanting something from him. _It had only been four months, and Shizuo already knew so many of Izaya’s quirks._ The blond tossed the covers off himself and made a reminder to turn down the sheets and do some laundry today after breakfast.

Izaya was standing under the spray of the showerhead, hands shifting through his hair, the lines of his body obscured by the frosted glass of the shower walls. Shizuo dropped his briefs and reached to open the door, stepping inside behind Izaya and watching as the brunet’s shoulders slumped. Izaya took a step backwards into Shizuo, and the blond wrapped his arms around Izaya, dropping his mouth to Izaya’s temple to press a kiss there before he released him and reached for the shampoo. _Izaya liked being pampered too._ Izaya didn’t care for being hovered over, he was as independent as they came, but when he wanted attention, he liked to _bask_ in it, and Shizuo was always happy to provide. His hands ran through Izaya’s hair carefully, and Shizuo listened as the quiet sighs slipped past Izaya’s lips. Shizuo took great care in washing Izaya, making sure the touch was clinical as he ran his hands over the plains of his body, hands gentle as he touched at Izaya’s puffy hole to clean the remnants of Shizuo’s pleasure from the previous night. _Izaya hated condoms._ He had made Shizuo go to the clinic after the first time they had slept together, wanting to make sure he was clean—not that Shizuo had much sexual experience—and then demanded that Shizuo _forget_ the condoms. Shizuo understood after the third or fourth time, that Izaya liked to feel the come slip from his body, stick to his thighs— _Izaya liked feeling used._

 _“Mmm,_ if you’re going to be so thorough, you should just slip ba- _ah, that feels so good.”_ Shizuo let his fingers press a little deeper as he stepped into Izaya, wanting to silence his words because they always came off bitter. _Izaya’s moans were sweeter._ Izaya bent himself over, bracing his hands against the tiled wall the showerhead was mounted to as he pressed backwards against Shizuo’s touch. Izaya always looked good like that, hunched over as he let the pleasure wash over him. Shizuo liked watching Izaya come apart at the seams, liked to see relaxation coat his features, and Shizuo _especially_ liked that he was the cause. Izaya was always sated, and Shizuo wanted for nothing besides Izaya’s happiness. _He **really** didn’t know how he had gotten here. _Shizuo used his unoccupied hand to grab at Izaya’s ass, to pull a cheek away so he could watch as Izaya’s body swallowed his fingers, and it took him several minutes to realize that Izaya was looking over his shoulder, eyes hazy and cheeks flushed.

 _“Sh-Shizu—Shizuo~”_ Izaya’s lips parted sweetly with Shizuo’s name rather than that _stupid_ nickname Izaya liked so much, and Shizuo draped his body over Izaya’s as his fingers withdrew from him. Shizuo pressed several kisses to Izaya’s shoulders before reaching between their bodies to grip himself. _He really wasn’t hard._ Shizuo was always more than happy to service Izaya when he asked, and the best aphrodisiac for Shizuo was Izaya’s euphoria, but at this moment, it would take a little more to get his body to participate. _He had been rough with Izaya last night._ He had to be sore, and yet the little masochist that drove Izaya to do all kinds of things, was _demanding_ more like always. Izaya seemed to sense Shizuo’s hesitation— _Shizuo was taking too long—_ and he pushed himself away from the wall before turning around.

“Not in the mood?” Izaya’s eyes were still fever bright with pleasure, and his cock was leaking, but his hand was reaching for Shizuo’s wrist to pull his hand away and lace their fingers together. Izaya didn’t do it often, but Shizuo recognized it for the comfort it was. Shizuo shook his head as he watched disappointment flash across the crimson shade of Izaya’s eyes.

“No, it’s not that—you’re okay right? I know I wasn’t as careful as I usually am last night—I want to make sure you’re okay.” Izaya’s eyes brightened further, amusement swallowing a portion of the desire as a giddy laugh left his lips. Izaya stepped into Shizuo, pressing himself against his hip and rutting there for a moment until his laugh turned to a broken moan.

“Oh yeah, _I’m great._ I’d be better if you would stick your cock in me.” Izaya’s cheeks were bright pink as he spoke his reply, and Shizuo reached to grip at his hips to still his movements. Izaya let out a soft whine, and then a delighted chirp as Shizuo reached to grip the underside of his thighs and raise him into the air. Shizuo stepped closer to the tiled wall and pressed Izaya against it as the brunet wrapped his limbs around Shizuo, his legs locked around his waist, his arms tight around his shoulders.

“So needy.”

_“Mmm, you love it.”_

“Yeah—I love _you_ too.” Shizuo dropped his mouth to Izaya’s before he could say something to spoil the moment, and reached to stroke himself a few times before pressing the head of his cock to Izaya’s entrance. A whimper vibrated through Shizuo’s lips from Izaya’s as he pressed inside, and Shizuo knew better than to take his time at this point. A slow thrust had Shizuo seated as deeply inside Izaya as he could reach in this position. Izaya parted from him to let out a handful of heavy pants, his hips shifting until he was throwing his head back. _Right there._ Shizuo put a little more weight behind the press of his body, and Izaya let out a choked gasp of his name as his fingers dug into his shoulders. Shizuo really wanted to take his time with this, wanted to show Izaya a good time like always, but he wanted to do this _his_ way. Izaya liked it fast and hard, a race to the finish line, and Shizuo didn’t hate it, but her certainly liked this _more._ The press of his body each time he receded and slipped back inside was deliberate, weighted evenly, and Izaya was clinging to him like his life depended on it.

“Shizuo— _ah—Shi-Shizuo, come on._ Want it faster.”

“Take it easy Izaya, just relax, let me get you there. I’ll get you there just fine like this.” Shizuo braced a hand against the wall and shifted his other to Izaya’s hip, squeezing there as he let his hips snap a little harder. Speed could be replaced with weight, with intent, and Shizuo was _intent_ on abusing Izaya’s prostate. He wanted Izaya sensitive, because when he was fucked out, Izaya was _cuddly._ Izaya liked being held and cradled when he was tired or feeling particularly sentimental— _which really wasn’t often—_ and Shizuo loved that part of him most. Izaya would get clingy with him, keep him within arms-reach, hover over Shizuo as much as he himself hated being hovered over. Shizuo liked the attention, and sure, maybe this was a little selfish of him, he could forgive himself for it later.

Izaya came apart exactly as Shizuo imagined he would. His legs tightening around Shizuo’s waist, his arms wound further around Shizuo’s shoulders and his nails dug in deep as he cried out, his cock spilling between their bodies and splashing against Shizuo’s chest. He trembled for several minutes as Shizuo continued to rock into his body, wanting to prolong his aftershocks as Shizuo reached his own end. Izaya clung onto Shizuo long after he began to slip from the grip of Izaya’s body, and only shifted when Shizuo reached to turn the tap, to re-heat the water as it had run cold. Shizuo washed Izaya a second time, careful to just rinse away the evidence for now, thinking Izaya would want to soak after this to ease the tension in his muscles. The water was turned off, and Shizuo made sure that Izaya was alright to stand without his support before stepping out of the shower and reaching to turn the tap for the tub. As the water tumbled into it, thin arms wrapped around his waist and a soft mouth pressed a kiss to the space between Shizuo’s shoulder blades.

 _“Breakfast.”_ Shizuo chuckled as he turned around in Izaya’s grasp, his fingers trailing carefully across Izaya’s cheek before cupping it and dipping down to kiss his forehead.

“Yeah—bath’s ready, you go ahead and soak. I’ll come get you when it’s done.” Izaya nodded his head, his eyes still a little hazy and he stepped around Shizuo and sunk into the water. He let out a sigh, and Shizuo reached to turn the tap off as Izaya got comfortable. He almost wanted to just sit and watch Izaya, wanted to witness and marvel him as he was. Instead Shizuo reached for a towel and dried off before slipping into the bedroom and then the closet to pull on some clothes. It had only been four months since things had changed between him and Izaya, but already the majority of Shizuo’s belonging where here in Izaya’s apartment. He still had his, still made rent payments for it, still went back every couple days just to be on his own, but the majority of his time was spent here. Shizuo dressed quickly, pulling on a clean pair of sweats—sans underwear—before slipping towards the kitchen to get a start on breakfast. Izaya wasn’t a picky eater as Shizuo suspected he would be, he just had a bitter palate that clashed with Shizuo’s sweeter one.

Shizuo made a traditional breakfast, two batches of miso—one bitter one sweet—white rice, grilled salmon, edamame just for the mouth feel and a little more substance, and a few sheets of nori were used to garnish the meal as Shizuo plated it and set it out on Izaya’s desk. Shizuo ate at the table just because he was used to doing so, and Izaya always took his meals at his desk— _there was always work to be done._ Shizuo shifted his weight from foot to foot, thinking he had forgotten something, and turned around as the coffee maker started going off. He let out a sigh, thinking he was glad that he was in the habit of turning the thing on whenever he entered the kitchen now. Izaya hated breakfast without his coffee. Shizuo pulled a mug from one of the upper cabinets and poured a steaming cup of the bitter substance before placing it next to Izaya’s waiting meal.

“Oh, good morning Heiwajima-san.” Shizuo turned at the sound of a female voice to catch sight of Namie. She was looking at him as clinically as she always did, that permanently bored expression sort of comforting, but her mouth was tipped up at the corners. Shizuo had liked Namie, how she never pried, how she seemed disinterested in him until he became a regular visitor. She was a familiar comfort these days, and she happened to keep Shizuo company when Izaya wasn’t around. Shizuo dipped his head before turning towards his own plate as he served himself some rice.

“Are you hungry Namie? I made more than enough if you haven’t eaten. There’s coffee too.”

“Sounds wonderful, I was in a rush this morning.” Shizuo nodded his head before turning to retrieve another plate and serving tray. He dished out for Namie and set the tray down on the counter for her before moving to retrieve a second mug. She took her coffee just like Izaya— _black as night—_ and she reached for the extended mug once it was filled. She took a drink and let out a sigh before picking up her chopsticks.

“For someone that doesn’t like coffee, you make the best cup I’ve ever had. You should open a shop.” Shizuo chuckled, telling her that if Tom ever fired him, he’d have something to fall back on. Shizuo shifted back towards the bedroom to go and fetch Izaya, only to find him already in the closet, staring blankly at his clothes. Shizuo took a moment to appreciate Izaya’s bareness, liking that the brunet didn’t mind wandering naked as long as he wasn’t in view of that huge bay window behind his desk.

“Having trouble finding something that fits?” Izaya turned at the sound of Shizuo’s voice, his eyes roving over his naked chest and down to the sweats that were hanging a little _too_ low on his hips. His mouth curved upwards before he turned around completely, hands shifting towards his hips to grab there as he gave Shizuo a warm look.

“Trying to figure out if I wanted to go out or not after breakfast. I think I’ll head out.” Shizuo dipped his head and stepped close enough to kiss him before pulling away and moving towards the door.

“It’s warm today, don’t over-heat while you’re out. Breakfast is ready and waiting for you. Namie is here too, ready for work.” Shizuo had half been expecting Izaya to call him back, to demand why Shizuo wasn’t going to go with him, but there was no protest, and Shizuo was left to retreat towards his own waiting meal next to Namie. He had barely sat down when Izaya slipped towards him in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, both articles of clothing most definitely _Shizuo’s._ Shizuo swallowed his mouthful and turned to watch as Izaya shifted towards his desk, grabbed for his tray, and then closed in on Shizuo. Izaya set his food down and then slipped into the chair on Shizuo’s other side before digging in. _That’s strange._

Izaya had elected to stay in after all, and he ate his meal with Shizuo, then requested that Shizuo sit with him and watch some television while Namie puttered around the split-level doing whatever mundane tasks Izaya had set her too. Shizuo had sat down and made himself comfortable, only for Izaya to manhandle him into a position that suited him better. Shizuo was currently reclining against an arm of the sofa, with Izaya cradled to his body like a koala. Shizuo would never complain, and he knew that part of the reason behind the behaviour was because Izaya had been sated early in the day— _but this was different._ Izaya enjoyed a good cuddle when he was in the mood, but he was _clinging_ to Shizuo, his ear pressed firmly to Shizuo’s chest to listen to his heartbeat, and his grip on him was much tighter than usual. Shizuo wasn’t sure what had gotten into him, but it was a little concerning, and he wanted to understand the abnormal behaviour. So when Izaya sent Namie on an errand, Shizuo decided then would be a good time to bring up the very recent change.

“You okay?” Izaya shifted his head until Shizuo could catch his eyes, and he let out a hum that told Shizuo he was fine. _The squeeze Izaya gave Shizuo said something else._ Shizuo cleared his throat and shifted his hands to run along Izaya’s spine, a soothing gesture he knew the Raven liked.

“You’re just—acting different. I want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Different how?”

 _“You’re being clingy._ It’s not a bad thing, I really like it, seeing you go all soft on me—but it’s concerning too. You’re not usually like this, I—I want to make sure I haven’t done something, or forgotten about something important.” Izaya raised himself some until he was supporting himself using the armrest Shizuo was reclined against. Izaya was looking at Shizuo strangely, as if he was trying to figure out how Shizuo had noticed a change. Shizuo wanted to wipe that blank look off Izaya’s face, but he wasn’t really sure how. Apparently, he didn’t need to say anything because color was drifting across Izaya’s cheeks as he looked away, his bottom lip sucked between his teeth. _He’s—acting shy._

 _“You told me you loved me this morning.”_ Shizuo blinked dumbly at Izaya for a few moments, trying to figure out why that would be significant. _Then he realized it was the first time he had said it._ Shizuo thought it all the time, liked to think about how much he loved Izaya. He was the only person in the world that could piss Shizuo off so completely he’d want to kill him one moment, and then want to wrap him up in his arms the next. Shizuo knew his emotions for Izaya were strong, but he had neglected to be vocal about that. Shizuo gave Izaya a hopeless smile as he reached to cup a cheek. Izaya started slightly, and then closed his eyes as he pressed into the touch, nuzzling his face against Shizuo’s calloused palm.

“I do love you. If this is how you’re going to be when I say it, I’m sorry I haven’t told you more often. _I love you Izaya._ I love you so much my chest aches when we’re apart, and all I can do is think about you, even when we’re together.” Shizuo watched as tears welled up in Izaya’s eyes, and for a moment he thought the brunet might cry. Then a hand was raising to overlap Shizuo’s at his cheek before he was dropping his head to kiss Shizuo. It was languid and lazy, and Shizuo had never enjoyed a kiss more. He could taste Izaya’s sincerity, how shocked he was at hearing verbal confirmation of Shizuo’s affection, and he could taste the coffee on his tongue too. Izaya pulled away a moment later, eyes looking clearer and free of tears, and they were burning brighter than Shizuo had ever seen them.

“No one’s ever said that to me before.”

 _“I’ll tell you every day then.”_ Izaya let out a huff of amusement before he dipped his head further to nose at the underside of Shizuo’s jaw.

“I love you too you know. Don’t expect me to say it all the time— _but I do. I love you Heiwajima Shizuo.”_ Shizuo let out a contented hum and pulled Izaya more snuggly against him, reveling in the warmth he was feeling. Shizuo spent some time drawing absentminded patterns on Izaya’s lower back, having pulled his shirt up enough to expose his skin, while the both of them watched some sort of drama that was on TV. Namie returned a little while later with whatever it was Izaya had asked for— _and a bag of groceries._ Izaya had moved towards his desk with the folder of papers Namie had given him, and Shizuo would have stayed where he was if Namie hadn’t called his name.

“Heiwajima-san, I thought I might stop and pick you up a few things. I know you like sweets, and they had a strawberry milk I thought you might enjoy.”

“Thanks Namie, that was thoughtful.” Shizuo took the bag from her to see it was filled with various candies and chocolates—all of them ones Shizuo liked very much—and a couple of single-serve cartons of strawberry milk. Shizuo offered her a hug before she disappeared onto the split level and towards the desk that sat next to the kitchen. Shizuo put his snacks away, choosing to indulge in that strawberry milk after dinner as a treat, before shifting towards the bedroom. The weather was nice, and now that Izaya had a bone, he’d be gnawing away on it for the next few hours. Shizuo thought about calling Tom to go for a drink as he changed in the closet. _Izaya stopped him before he could pull his shirt over his head._

“Where are you going?”

“Thought I might go see Tom, grab lunch and a drink or something. Do you want me to bring you back anything?”

“I’d rather you stayed here.” Izaya’s eyes were blank as he looked at Shizuo, and the smile he was offering said that Shizuo had done something wrong. The blond spent a moment or two going over the last twenty minutes or so, trying to decide what it was he had done, when the conclusion knocked on the closed bedroom door.

“Orihara, I have the reports you wanted finished and filed in your desk. I’ll get started on that next project, let me know if you need anything else.” Her footsteps retreated, and Shizuo watched as _anger_ flitted across Izaya’s face. For a moment, Shizuo worried he might go and fire her, and while he didn’t _like_ Namie, he certainly didn’t _dislike_ her either. She was good company when she wanted to be.

“Are you jealous?” _That wasn’t what he meant to say._ Izaya’s head swiveled around to send a glare at Shizuo that confirmed the suspicion, and he let a laugh slip through his teeth. Shizuo couldn’t help the sound as he pulled Izaya back into him, hands running up and down his spine to soothe him.

“I just spent how long curled up with you on the couch after _amazing_ sex? I told you I love you today too, though I’ve been thinking it— _probably the whole time—_ and you’re worried about _Namie?_ Izaya, if you hadn’t noticed, she’s more than a _little_ outside my type.”

“Am I not entitled to my feelings then?” Shizuo bit at his tongue, thinking that maybe he had gone about this the wrong way. Izaya pinched at Shizuo’s hip and Shizuo stepped backwards to give him space as the brunet offered a sour look.

“Just because she’s _out_ of your type doesn’t mean—”

“I like my partner to be a little on the thinner side. Boney is fine as long as they have a healthy appetite, athletic too, I like to run, and someone that can give a good chase. I want them to have dark hair— _black—_ and fine features, sharp and pointed. They have to use fifty different types of lotion too, they need to spend _hours_ in the bathroom before bed, the anticipation turns me on. I want to see the sunset in their eyes every time I look at them, and I _really_ need them to have a cock. A pretty one I can suck on whenever I want to.” Izaya’s face had gone bright red as Shizuo continued to talk, and the blond didn’t miss the pressure that was growing against his thigh after having stepped back into the brunet. Shizuo walked Izaya backwards until he could push him to sit on the mattress while Shizuo dropped to his knees. _Izaya wasn’t wearing underwear._ He had pulled Shizuo’s shorts on without bothering with his briefs, and Shizuo had never been more thankful for such easy access.

“Have I got your attention Izaya?” The brunet nodded his head just before a wreaked moan was torn from his lips as Shizuo slid down his cock. _He really did like this._ Shizuo hated bitter foods, but the bitterness of Izaya on his tongue was his _favorite_ thing. He didn’t bother with trying to tease Izaya, instead taking him clear to the root and swallowing around him before coming back up for a breath—just to repeat the process. Izaya was howling, and Shizuo was sure that Namie would probably _quit_ before Izaya could fire her. Shizuo worked on tonguing at the slit of Izaya’s cock for a little while, suckling just on the head while he worked his hand up and down the shaft. Izaya’s fingers dove into Shizuo’s hair when he pulled away to lick a slick line from base to tip, and he was tugging on Shizuo’s hair, broken pleas of _more_ leaving his throat. _Shizuo could give him more if he wanted it—Tom could wait._ Shizuo stood and pushed at the sweats he was still wearing, watching as Izaya shifted until he was lying across the mattress, his legs spread obscenely wide as he reached a hand to press dry fingers into his hole. Shizuo reached to stroke his cock as he watched Izaya play with himself.

 _“Have I got your attention Shizuo?”_ Shizuo offered up a vicious grin before slipping into the space between Izaya’s thighs, his cockhead teasing at the loosened muscle until it _sucked him in._ Izaya clenched down hard, a soft sigh leaving his throat as he threw his head back, his arms striking out to grab for Shizuo to pull him closer. Shizuo pressed himself against Izaya, flushing their bodies from groin to shoulder as he wrapped Izaya up in his arms, needing the grip on him for leverage as he started moving his hips. Izaya seemed _overly_ sensitive as Shizuo fucked into him, his cries sweeter and higher-pitched than usual, and Shizuo decided he liked them _better_ like this. Liked hearing Izaya’s breath catch half-way through a moan, how his muscles tightened up around Shizuo with every press inside his body.

“I love you Izaya— _love you.”_ Shizuo couldn’t stop the words from slipping away from him, but Izaya’s limbs were tightening around Shizuo and a soft cry of his name had the blond raising his head to catch sight of Izaya’s face. There were tears in his eyes and a bright stain of red across his cheeks. His lips were parted in a constant pant, and it looked as though he was on the verge of passing out. Shizuo thought to slow down but it seemed Izaya saw it flash across his face, because he was frowning now and his fingers were scrabbling for purchase in Shizuo’s hair.

“S-say it again Shizuo—I w— _ah, f-f-fuck, fuck right there.”_ Shizuo angled his hips to strike at Izaya’s prostate more consistently and dropped his mouth to Izaya’s to steal his breath further as he kissed devotion into him. Shizuo pulled away as he allowed his hips to slow, wanting to make this special since Izaya was apparently feeling insecure at the moment. _His overconfident raven, all in a fuss over a girl._ Shizuo raised himself until he could sit back on his heels, dragging Izaya’s up with him until they were balanced precariously in the center of their mattress. Izaya had slipped further down Shizuo’s cock, and from the squeal he let out, Shizuo was sitting _right_ against his prostate now. It allowed him to reach deeper as he thrusted into Izaya’s body, to sweeten the burn of it all as he made this purposeful, as Shizuo worked to impress upon Izaya how _much_ he loved him. In four months, Shizuo had sold his reason for life to Izaya, and now he needed to make sure _his_ brunet knew he wasn’t going to get rid of him so easily.

“I love you Izaya, _I love you so much it hurts._ My chest hurts when we’re not together, and it _burns_ when we are. Sometimes you piss me off so much I want to kill you— _ah—a-and other times I want to kiss you senseless._ I love watching you fall apart because of me, t-that I can even make you feel this way. _I love that you want to feel this way with **me**.” _Shizuo was losing his control, his hips were snapping into Izaya’s so hard it hurt, and he was sure that not all of Izaya’s cries were from pleasure. Shizuo knew he was holding Izaya too tightly, knew his hands would leave behind marks, _knew_ he would ache later, and still couldn’t bring himself to stop. Izaya wanted to hear how he felt, wanted to feel it, to feel cherished and cared for and _wanted,_ and Shizuo wanted those things too. He wanted Izaya to feel that way always, because Izaya made _him_ feel that way. Even when he was cruel, even when he wanted space, Shizuo knew that Izaya cared—even if he wasn’t always the best at showing it. Shizuo cared so deeply for Izaya, he thought that someone as smart as his love wouldn’t need the blond to spell it out. _He did, and Shizuo didn’t mind that._ Shizuo wanted to be vocal about his feelings, especially if Izaya liked hearing them. _Liked hearing Shizuo loved him._

Orgasm fell upon the both of them without warning, and Izaya tightened around Shizuo everywhere as he threw his head back with a choked scream. Shizuo didn’t fare much better, though he chose to muffle the growl that burst from him against Izaya’s throat, chose to latch on there and paint Izaya’s skin violet to match the rose petals blooming across his body. _Shizuo needed to be more careful next time._ He and Izaya collapsed side by side still tangled up in each other a few moments later, and Shizuo felt himself begin to slip free of the clutch of Izaya’s body. Momentary discomfort was replaced with Izaya sprawling himself on top of Shizuo, and the blond allowed his fingers to trail lazily along his spine. Shizuo was sort of tired now, he could do with a nap— _and it seemed Izaya could too._ The brunet was already asleep, lips parted as he snored quietly. _Shizuo really wasn’t sure how he had even gotten here._ He wasn’t about to start questioning it though, not when _this,_ when being wrapped up in Izaya’s special brand of jealous affection was so much better than anything else. Shizuo loved Izaya, _that’s all that really mattered, at least, to Shizuo._

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been drowning the last few weeks, in homework and my really shitty mental state, and I hit a writer's block. After watching some anime, and listening to some sad music, I feel good enough to post something I've been working on—since all of it looks like shit right now.
> 
> As usual, leave a kudos, leave a comment—but I always prefer emails. I'm still taking requests, though it is taking me longer than usual to write them, and not all of them are posted here—some get posted to my Tumblr. 
> 
> Hit me here: sin.menaceinc@gmail.com


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